Jesus and Friends

I like absolutes. I love formulas. If you do this then you will get this. Easy, predictable and controllable. I tend to try to simplify life to those formulas. I don't think it is the easy part that attracts me. It is the structure and the ability to see what I am seeking to attain. However, it doesn't seem to really help. It actually creates a goal that leaves me feeling defeated and at a loss for hope. I always seem to come up short and realize that life is just not that black and white. In my journey of putting unrealistic expectations on myself, I am ever aware that I am not enough. I am not perfect and my focus and goal of reaching these accolades is well, impossible. Some might say that is super discouraging. I say it is freeing. Coming to terms with my inadequacies is nothing new.

One area where I tend to swing back and forth is my relationship with Christ and others. There are times where I solely focus on growing closer to Him and digging into what He has for me. I become rigid on what I should be doing and how I should be doing it. Reading, praying and then when I fall short, I become frustrated. Or, I tend to focus so much of my attention outwardly. I desire friendships and spend my time investing in my relationships. Both of those are important things. I just tend to narrow my focus to one or the other. Not intentionally, but naturally.

The freedom and lesson that I am learning is that I need both. Not out of obligation but out of need. I find that if I am growing closer to Christ I naturally want to grow closer to others. It provides the foundation and confidence to build relationships. At the same time, as I spend time with friends and journey through life together I have a greater desire to spend time with Christ. My journey with Christ leads me past my black and white thinking in many areas and leads me to the true freedom that Christ intended.

I encourage you today to allow yourself to walk in the grace Christ gives. Look past the rigidness of religion and walk in the freedom of truth. We need Christ and we need each other. The path to true freedom is one worth taking........

Plastic Cups

Plastic cups. I love them. Sometimes I like the big ones with handles and sometimes I like the small narrow ones. Either way they just get the job done. They aren't fancy, but simple. Anyway, in my deep analogy of life I decided I desire to be a plastic cup. Crazy, I know. Don't get me wrong, I love to drink out of fancy cups every now and then. I enjoy getting dressed up and going out for a nice meal. There are times we even use fancy cups in our house. It is the little things in life that add flavor. But, a plastic cup...it just says dependable, honest, and timeless.

I am pretty sure I spent a lot of my life trying to be the fancy cup. Trying to be all shiny, perfect, and grab the attention of all that passed. I desired to be noticed, chosen, and stand above the rest. My intentions were good and I was just trying to be the best I could be. Believing, that to really be successful I had to do great things. But, that gets tiring. It is hard to stay shiny all of the time. The world knows this and encourages you to spend your entire life seeking to keep your shine. But, if  you are lucky enough your shine wears off. You start to realize what really matters and embrace the simplicities of life.

Like being dependable, stable, and loyal. The most important one is not needing to be the fancy cup. Learning to be yourself and faithful in the life God has given you can be a difficult task. No one may ever notice you, seek you out, or celebrate your simplicity. Actually, that is the gift. You are free from the need to be noticed. You are free to enjoy the friendships you have, free to embrace the path you are on whether rocky or smooth,  free to live intentionally, and free to love unconditionally. Most of all you are free.

Somewhere along the way we bought into the lie of the shiny cup. I know I did and I looked at the plain plastic cup as a mistake or second best. Today, I see things differently. I enjoy my plastic cup of iced tea and sit quietly. Enjoying the life of loving others well, keeping life simple, and encouraging others on this journey. A path to freedom is a path worth taking.....

Selfless Love

As I think about Mother's Day I think about all of the pressure we put on ourselves to get it right. Motherhood, I mean. I've had many moments in my own journey where I  thought, well I ruined that one and they will never be the same or stressed over the struggles my kids face or worried about the path God has led our little family on as we truly seek to follow Him. But, one unique concept I see in all of the prayers, worry, tears, or frustration is in this area of my life it really isn't about me being the perfect mother. It is about loving my kids and wanting the best for them.

I admit in today's world there are so many ideas on what a good mother looks like and offers her children that there is really no way we can measure up. However, at the root of all motherhood is the selfless love a mother has for her children. A willingness to forget herself for the betterment of the family. There can be lots of discussion on how to be a great mother, what our children need, etc. but that's not what I am getting at here. I am celebrating the beautiful ability to put others before ourselves, which is not a normal concept. We are life givers, heart healers, and spring boards in the journey of  the little hearts entrusted to us. 

In the rhetoric of God's definition of beauty we find this life altering and life changing task to develop between dirty diapers, tons of stains, sleepless nights, heart aches, tears, and victories. We go from the routine mundane to the depths of our children's souls all in thirty minutes. It isn't a put together, get it all right job assignment. The beauty and depth is found in the mistakes, barely making it, and sometimes just not having a clue as to what to do next. Fortunately, the put together perfect celebration of mother's is just that, a celebration. The day to day, dancing in a messy house, looking for shoes, or tears from molding a heart are what real motherhood looks like. It isn't for the faint of heart.

But, just like any journey we find ourselves on, that is gifted to us from our Father, it changes us. It molds us, and makes us softer. It breaks us and oftentimes leaves us wondering if we can keep going. The tough times are present on a daily basis, sometimes small and sometimes huge but they always point us back to our source of strength. We need God and we need each other. I am thankful for my kids ability to help me move past myself and mold me into someone who truly sees others. Motherhood is the greatest missional opportunity we have each day. We get to love those who really can't offer us anything in return, but the love we experience from giving self lessly to those little humans( best word choice I could find...aka monsters)  brings great joy.

As I think of the legacy of women in my family I am overjoyed with their love for their family. The funny thing is this love always extended to others outside their family's too. God always takes what he teaches us on the inside and spreads it outward into the lives of others. Our families are no different. I am so thankful for the lessons my family has taught me, from learning to take care of myself so I can take care of my family, to encouraging me to use a timer when I cook (burnt is normal at my house), to learning to release those I love into the hands of the one who really has control. There are so many more, However, the willingness to love and give is always a path worth taking......

The Mundane

I'm just going to confess I am a dreamer and an idealist. I am a peace maker, hate conflict and long to live in a world where everything just makes sense. I like to see life through the eyes of Louis Armstrong in ,"What a Wonderful World". Even though our world is far from that, I think the closest example of this is a holiday. They are just plain fun! We have great food, get dressed up, everyone gets along (usually), see our extended family, and just celebrate. I love holidays! The trials of life seem to take a backseat for just a few moments.

 I believe for many of us the day after a holiday can be a let down. Mommas have all of the messes to clean up after the party. The candy, dishes, and chores left undone from the celebration can be a grim reminder that "the party is over". So what do we do with those days between the celebrations that we have to live the day to day. The mundane. The normal schedule where there aren't any presents, baskets, or family parties. The trials resurface and we "go back to work".

As I think on the day after Easter, I can't help but be thankful that Jesus has taught me how to live the in between. Not only have I learned that he is my joy, but I'm finally understanding that that was actually the purpose of it all. My salvation was intertwined from the cross to the grave, but it was meant to be lived out in the in between. Jesus is my constant, the truths of who he is gives me the life, joy, and strength to not only face the mundane, but make the mundane my celebration. In a world where we focus on the loudest, expensive, and most perfect of anything, I am given the freedom to embrace the beauty of a mundane life of quiet, simple, and imperfect brokenness that rejoices in the fact that I don't have it all and don't have it all together. Now that is something to celebrate. My lack is fulfilled in the person of Jesus and if I have him, I have everything. So for this simple minded idealist I can cling to that hope. Even when trials are not gone, life doesn't add up or look like the perfect picture I have painted in my little mind, I can rejoice. His truths set me free, his love is enough, and his purposes mend the messes that I can't fix.

We walk, seek, and embrace the life we have before us. The journey off the beaten path is a path worth taking. Enjoy the mundane.

Bright Days

I am not an avid shopper. I am far from trendy and catch onto the latest fads way after they were a fad. It takes me a little longer to embrace new things and I enjoy simplicity and consistency. However, I do enjoy shopping and looking for new forms of my old clothing. I tend to buy the same brands, same items, and to my family's dismay most of the time even the same colors. Hallelujah, for the times I find a shirt I love in at least three different colors I wear. It really just sounds like I am a very boring person. Maybe so, but this is how I have been all my life. I know what I like and what I don't. I would also say this is how I have followed Jesus most my life. I love Jesus. I love spending time with him, learning about him, talking about him, and telling others about him. But, I have my preferences on how I think my life should look and how I think it should go. I have a perfect idea of how I can best serve and love Jesus with my life.

But, unlike my wardrobe life is not that predictable. Over the years I have found myself in places that I never dreamt God would take me. Good and bad. I have journeyed in faith, not always by my own choosing and most of the time because it was all I could cling to. In my mind life should be safe, pain free, and comfortable even as I follow hard after God. I used to live in avoidance and fear of trials or pain. I do not go looking for it these days, but I don't fear it either. Through the trials of this world God has shown me how good He is despite the outcomes in my life. He has helped me release  my expectations and embrace my journey. He has also given me the directions (in his own timing) on how to navigate the paths before me. These paths are ones I wouldn't have necessarily chosen for myself. Oftentimes, they are more treacherous, scary, and equally more beautiful and rewarding than I could ever imagine.

Maybe that is why I love simplicity in my wardrobe. His journey is anything from boring. The funny thing is I am even beginning to venture out in my clothing colors too. I'm not quite ready to get rid of my favorite gray sweater ,which everyone in my family dislikes. But, I have added lots of bright colors and maybe even a few floral patterns! I'm not ready to get too crazy. It is all in taking the next step down the path before us. One step at a time. Keep walking your path even if it looks unfamiliar. His path is always worth taking.

Happy New Year

                                                                Faith is a game changer.

                                                                        Beth Moore

 

I love the feeling of January. Mainly because I clean everything and get rid of lots and lots of stuff. I love buying a new planner, calendar, and just starting fresh. I am rested from a long and exciting Christmas break. I say goodbye to last year and look into the days ahead. But, there is always this part of me that isn't so excited.

 

To be honest there are times when I fear the future. What if something bad happens? What if this or that? What if I face a big change in my life, good or bad? If you have lived very long, you know exactly what I am talking about. For me, it can simply be the fear of the unknown. I wish I could say I have grown up and no longer have these types of fears. But, I understand the realities of difficulty. Fortunately, my faith is still growing. It is not necessarily a "positive" mindset or an assurance that all of my prayers will be answered. My faith is found simply in the person of Jesus. Trust me, it isn't because of any supernatural holiness on my part, but in spite of it.

 

The unique concept about faith is it is found in my fear. In my inadequacies and my inability to overcome this life on my own. Hope meets me in my doubts and gives me faith to follow and listen. It isn't just a blind hope that all will be well and I will survive. Faith becomes my journey as I walk toward or through a situation. This hope filled faith in Christ leads me and guides me through difficult circumstances or leads me down the road. I choose to trust Christ and His words despite how I may feel or the issues around me. It is such a narrow road this faith journey. A still, quiet, voice amidst a loud, roaring life. As we look to Christ, he is our hope and hope is the birthing of faith. If we have hope we know we can make it. If we know we can make it we are able to keep going. In our surrender God will equip us with the wisdom, insight, strength, or peace we need to keep walking and following his directions.

 

Oftentimes, the hardest part of our faith journey isn't "having faith," but "living faith." To step in and down the paths that He leads. Faith in the person of Christ is who gives us the courage to step out into the unknown or make it through life-altering situations. Our peace isn't merely found in what the unknown holds, but it is found in the one who holds us. Be encouraged this year, he is our comfort, guide, strength, and peace. Through the Holy Spirit we can move forward with peace and be found faithful in all areas. Faith is a path worth taking!

 

Thank YOU

As I think about Thanksgiving, I am reminded to pause and give thanks for the blessings in my life. I am extremely thankful for how God continues to provide and be faithful in every realm. However, there seems to be a continuous theme that God uses in my life to bless me. I haven't always thought of this as a blessing. There have been times where it has felt like a huge burden and even a punishment when trials would overwhelm me. By being able to look behind me I can see how He has continually allowed a life in which I cannot live on my own. This goes beyond my need for Him, but in the practical realm of his purpose and plan for me.

As a special needs parent, I have an even greater understanding of community. Needing other people or allowing ourselves to be vulnerable with others is not a common American theme. We are taught from an early age about pride, self-sufficiency, and independence. All of which are necessary to function as an adult. However, there are times in our lives when we realize life is not meant to be walked alone. Our circumstances may drive us to reach out to accomplish our goals or they simply draw us out of ourselves and free us up to love those around us. Initially, we feel like a failure because we are unable to do it all on our own. But, we soon realize we have been given a rare gift. When God gives you a task that is too much for you or makes you overwhelmed, knowing He has a plan, purpose, and people will provide the peace you need.

If only I could go back to the beginning of our special needs journey and know what I know now. God has graciously provided the right people every step of the way. He knew our needs before we did. A day that had initially been a tragic mark on our family map, has turned out to give us a life of great blessing. In every trial and struggle, we are reminded of our inadequacy and our need for Christ and his plan. It is a blessing to get to share our life with so many amazing people on a daily basis. Not only do we have an amazing team for Benjamin, but we have amazing friends, teachers, church family, and family. Without our community of loved ones this would be a lonely journey. But, what a blessing to need others. So, today I am thankful I am unable to handle this life on my own.

I want to say thank you to the many people who have and do love on our family. Your smiles, questions, prayers do not go unnoticed. They are my treasure and I am blessed by you! Happy Thanksgiving!