Saturday, was a big day. All of the kids and family ventured out in the rain to watch Benjamin play in his very first soccer game. I admit we were a little nervous and not sure what to expect. It was his first game ever and anything was possible. His coach and teammates were awesome. They helped him get where he needed to be and adjust. He was so cute in his uniform. He had a couple funny moments and he did get a little frustrated, but all in all he did great.
As I thought about it yesterday, I was reminded that he had no idea just how big of a day he had. He didn't think like his family did, that it was a miracle for him to just be able to walk. He didn't remember the countless hours of therapy, work at home, and teachers who have helped him mature to where he is now. He has no idea of the hours spent in prayer and the hearts that he has touched.
He only sees his big sister cheering for him daily (when they aren't arguing), his little brother who loves him, and his younger cousin who looks up to him. His daddy who is helping him become a strong young man, grandparents who love unconditionally, and a mom that loves her little boy. Yesterday and everyday he is a happy kid who loves life and everyone else. He loves his family.
The gift of this journey is for us. We can see where he started and how God has worked miracle after miracle in his life. He has and is continuing to mold us as a family through this journey. We all hug a little tighter, enjoy life more fully, and try to embrace trials as blessing. I used to think blessing meant riches, ease, and comfort. Blessings are often found in the dark places, empty spots, and quiet. I still desire peace and struggle with fear, but God continues to be faithful.
During his game, Ben started crying out of frustration from not being able to get the ball. The mom in me hurt because he was upset and the last thing we want for him is to feel anymore pain. However, the coach in me knew that it was a great thing that he was frustrated. It meant he desired to compete. I hugged him and told him he was doing a great job!
God has used my hurts to make me more like him. The times of suffering in my life have drawn me to him and allowed him to mold me, move me, or release my grip. More importantly, he has revealed that He is the blessing. He is faithful. Benjamin is a constant reminder of God's faithfullness. His life isn't easy and he may never be completely healed this side of heaven, but his life will glorify God. We are beyond blessed to get to journey with him.
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