A Burdened Heart

I saw this title in a magazine, "An Unburdened Heart", I get where the author was going with their article on forgiveness and how our heart should be free from sin. But, I couldn't help but think about it in a different way. My mind immediately went to the burdens we carry for others. Their hurts, their pain, their suffering. Are we burdened or unburdened?

A basic definition of burden is : that which is carried, a load; that which is born of difficulty or obligation.  In today's society we try to steer clear of that which is burdensome. You hear things like, "I hate to be a burden" or "That's a heavy burden to bear." We opt for the easy, the light load, or the happiest of feelings. We run from burdens. Jesus ran to them. He sought them out. He favored the lowly and was so moved by compassion he carried our burdens to the cross.

In response to him carrying our burdens, we are obligated to carry the burdens of others even in the midst of carrying our own. Perhaps, this is the single most gift we are given as Christians. When we only focus on our own problems somehow they seem bigger. But, in the midst of reaching out our trials seem smaller or more distant. They don't go away and we still have to face them. But, often in our trials we have a choice to allow them to take us out or refocus our eyes on others. Some of my biggest burdens have later become my biggest passions.

Carrying someone's burden isn't ever about fixing it, it is simply being obedient to what God asks of you. You play a small part in a big plan. Small isn't something we do well with. We want bigger, better, all or nothing. As God has lead us on a journey of mission work in Africa, my heart has been burdened for many things. However, I  have to listen and trust God to show me where my efforts should be focused and what the best plan of action is and then follow through. My burden turns into action, but only by his leading. However, I have no doubt, he wants me to do something.

Where and what have you been burdened by? Where have you turned away because it was just too much? I challenge you to take a small step. You might feel like it won't make a difference. Trust me, it will. Love in any form is never small. Be burdened and see where God leads.

SMALL things

 

In a world that is constantly looking for the next “big” thing or convinces us of our need to be “known” sometimes God’s calling seems small? What if our lives aren’t seen by others, we don’t get constant praise, or what if we are totally forgotten? Does our life still have meaning? Is the value of it less?

As I think of my friend who makes bread in a small bakery in Africa, or the African teachers who day in and day out teach their students, or the small African churches lead by my friends who love Jesus- they do it faithfully and quietly everyday with no attention or notoriety. They challenge my American thoughts of what true success is and the motivation behind what we do. Their lives are full of influence, love, and compassion.

Could it be that our calling is to love and to live each and every day, even when no one knows, cares, or applauds. We “know” we don’t need the world’s approval or a standing ovation, but sometimes the world’s voice is just so darn loud. It is easy to get caught up in the rat race, even when we are following God. Our eyes and hearts can turn to a huge picture that we desire to paint oftentimes, with great intentions. But, it is the small details and intricate pieces of our lives that God chooses to paint his picture. He brings purpose to every element of our life. God tells us that he will do things in our time that we could never dream or imagine. My thoughts tend to run to big, huge, giant things, which sometimes he chooses. However, it seems often in his ultimate power and strength he chooses the weak, small, and the forgotten to show his glory. I am constantly being reminded that his ways are not our ways.

I don’t think it’s coincidental that God meets us in our brokenness and makes us new. Perhaps it is only when we have released our grip, given up on our plans, and choose to follow His ways that we find true peace and see the world through his eyes. What is it if a man gains the whole world, but forfeits his soul (Mathew 16:26)? True freedom is not just found in ultimate obedience, but in embracing the character and heart of Christ. So be encouraged today as you do the “small” things. It is in those” small” things that God’s greatness shines bright.

Trials

Let's just be honest. Sometimes life is just hard, unfair, and ridiculous. We search our theologies and dig deep for our understanding of suffering. Even when we find truth that God never leaves us, we live in a fallen world, and no hurt is ever wasted we still might struggle through our difficulties. We might have days where it is  hard to find the positive or we might have a full blown pity party. Either way, we  have all been there.

My kiddos are all very capable of throwing a grand fit, as their mother I usually can see one coming. Either it is fighting over a toy or one child accomplishing the easy task of annoying the others. I find myself looking for ways to intervene and stop the storm from brewing. However, sometimes I don't get there fast enough and emotions rise, tempers, flair, and the tears flow. I used to think that preventing these tantrums was my job. If I was a good parent then my kids wouldn't throw such fits. They would behave and stay under control. But, my son Benjamin has taught me a different perspective on emotions. He has sensory issues and can often escalate pretty fast if something is bothering him. Although, we constantly work on ways not to have meltdowns and work through our problems God has used Ben to gently reminded me that our feelings are real and deserve our attention. He has taught me that sometimes life gets a little out of control and we need a little help working through it. Great freedoms are found in true friendships of honesty and transparency.

We can deal with our struggles in a few ways. Perhaps, we choose to believe that we must not focus on them and keep going no matter what the cost. We try to earn the "I am a Super Christian" badge of honor, which by the way does not exist. We think we must do this to be good Christian or if we have enough faith  we won't struggle during hard times. We press through choosing to live in denial and not learn, grow, or move at all. However, our trials are sent to teach us, move us, shape us, and ultimately make us more like Christ. They are very real, tangible, and meant to be faced. We must engage not evade.

 James 1:2 states, "Consider it all joy my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds...". This joy is found not in the trial, but where there trial leads us. In our journey of dealing with Benjamin's needs we have faced countless trials. We have cried many tears, been frustrated beyond measure, and greatly rejoiced in tiny steps. We have found "joy" as we engage in this journey and it continues to shape us all. Life can get messy and usually doesn't go as planned. It isn't any different for any person. Our trials just look a little different. We all have them. Life is like a road. Bumps are sometimes huge potholes and we aren't sure we can ever climb out. Sometimes they are speed bumps that get our attention. Either way we are going to feel them.


One of my greatest joys is found in the messed up sayings of Ben. He hears us say things and often repeats them to the best of his ability. The other day in the kitchen he came over to me and said, "Mom, what would I ever do with you? You are the best mom I never had!"  His confused saying might seem silly or disappointing to some, but to me it rings of true joy and the faithfulness of God in every trial. It is a path worth taking.

True Strength

                                            

Weakness is defined as: lacking strength; a quality or feature regarded as a disadvantage or fault.


Weakness is a word that permits a clear negative connotation in our culture. The last thing we would want someone to say about us is; we are weak. More importantly, we go to great lengths to cover or hide our weaknesses. We are taught to keep pushing, trying, and appear that we have it all together. If we offer or show an apparent weakness we are considered inadequate. Although in some aspects of life a weakness can be a hindrance, in our spiritual life it is considered a great gift.

Unfortunately, our attitudes of self sufficiency and need to be strong leak into our spiritual lives. Our mere humanity and desire to have it all together totally barricades the power of God right out of our lives. In our attempt to look good, stay strong, and positive we tell God, I got this. I don't need your power in my life. I am good. It also shows others a false sense of ourselves and who we really rely on. By allowing others to see us in our weakness and in our great need for Christ they realize it is our dependence on Him that sets us apart. Not that we have it all together. Somewhere along the way we have adopted the concept that acknowledging our difficulties is complaining. We push on and push through all by ourselves. The ways of Jesus are so contrary to the ways of the world.

 In order to release his power in our lives we must first acknowledge our weakness. This is usually easier the bigger and more difficult the circumstance. However,  just resting in our weakness and the impossibilities of the situation is not enough. We must acknowledge the capabilities of Christ in faith to strengthen us and lead us through our circumstance.

Paul states in 2 Corinithians 12:9-10: "But, he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, I am strong."

The weaker we are and the less strength we possess in our own merit, allows for His strength and power to be magnified in us. This is a power that is unexplainable. Therefore, He receives the glory and others are drawn to him; not us. We find freedom in the power of Christ; not exhaustion and the need to be perfect.

This concept is one that hits close to home for me. I have always been driven and tried to achieve perfection. As I have continued to journey with my son Benjamin after a massive stroke during heart surgery, my eyes have been opened to just how powerful our weakness can be. In our fight to give Benjamin the best life possible and overcome very surmounting odds I have come face to face with my own weaknesses, lack of control, and slowly learned to embrace my great dependence on Christ.

God has used my sons weaknesses to show His glory and faithfullness as he continues to overcome difficulties and live for Him. In his weakness he has been made strong. The progress Benjamin has made can only be explained through the power of Christ and we give him all of the glory!

Striving

                                  Cease striving and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10)
     
So often we beat ourselves up and exhaust ourselves in mental barrages or faulty facts that can leave us defeated and down. We also can physically exhaust ourselves by the amount of tasks we seek to complete in one day. Which, is most of the time humanely impossible. No matter whether we work, stay home, are in school, or wherever we find ourselves we have busy schedules. We must ask ourselves am I truly living or striving to do or be more?

Striving is that endless feeling of never being good enough. Never getting it right. Always comparing and feeling a little less. Perhaps it is your striving that has anchored your plan to be the best wife, mother, daughter, and friend you could possibly be. You can no longer embrace your daily tasks, you simply complete them to move to the next one. Hoping all of the time that you will somehow be enough for someone, ultimately it is seeking to find our worth in the wrong places.

Or, maybe it is the striving to accumulate more stuff. Which is ironic, as mothers who have to clean it and put it away. However, in order to be enough we must have enough, right? Friends, money, clothes, etc. These are not bad in and of themselves, but when we place our confidence in them alone, they always come up empty. The irony in striving is not that we ever set out to do it. It always finds us. We mean well.

Circumstances. We are changers of them. We can work hard to try to prevent sadness, heartache, or difficulty for ourselves and those we love. Why would we want our kids to experience pain? No one desires to go through trials. But, what we often find in striving to hold our world together and make sure that all of the puzzle pieces fit together....we become exhausted. Our good intentions have dealt us a hand that we are not fit to hold. We are not the creator of our universe and we cannot keep up with keeping up for very long. We either become absorbed in running from one daunting task to another while believing we are doing a good thing or, we immerse ourselves underneath the blanket of defeat feeling helpless because our circumstances are no longer in our control.

 But, what if we actually chose to be who we are and not someone we want to be? To live our lives in whatever facet that lies before us and just live them well. To confidently take each day one step at a time. To acknowledge that God is in control and his purposes far outweigh any false reality I can strive to keep up. The trials are still there, laundry still has to be done, and everyone will still want dinner (every night!), but peace will come through our release of our world and the tight grip that we have on it.

So this is for you, tired momma. Exhausted teenager. Searching young adult. You are enough. You do not have to do more, be more, or have more. You can have confidence and peace in knowing that God sees you. He hears you and he cares. He is your strength. Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest (Mathew 11:28 NIV).