Trials

Let's just be honest. Sometimes life is just hard, unfair, and ridiculous. We search our theologies and dig deep for our understanding of suffering. Even when we find truth that God never leaves us, we live in a fallen world, and no hurt is ever wasted we still might struggle through our difficulties. We might have days where it is  hard to find the positive or we might have a full blown pity party. Either way, we  have all been there.

My kiddos are all very capable of throwing a grand fit, as their mother I usually can see one coming. Either it is fighting over a toy or one child accomplishing the easy task of annoying the others. I find myself looking for ways to intervene and stop the storm from brewing. However, sometimes I don't get there fast enough and emotions rise, tempers, flair, and the tears flow. I used to think that preventing these tantrums was my job. If I was a good parent then my kids wouldn't throw such fits. They would behave and stay under control. But, my son Benjamin has taught me a different perspective on emotions. He has sensory issues and can often escalate pretty fast if something is bothering him. Although, we constantly work on ways not to have meltdowns and work through our problems God has used Ben to gently reminded me that our feelings are real and deserve our attention. He has taught me that sometimes life gets a little out of control and we need a little help working through it. Great freedoms are found in true friendships of honesty and transparency.

We can deal with our struggles in a few ways. Perhaps, we choose to believe that we must not focus on them and keep going no matter what the cost. We try to earn the "I am a Super Christian" badge of honor, which by the way does not exist. We think we must do this to be good Christian or if we have enough faith  we won't struggle during hard times. We press through choosing to live in denial and not learn, grow, or move at all. However, our trials are sent to teach us, move us, shape us, and ultimately make us more like Christ. They are very real, tangible, and meant to be faced. We must engage not evade.

 James 1:2 states, "Consider it all joy my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds...". This joy is found not in the trial, but where there trial leads us. In our journey of dealing with Benjamin's needs we have faced countless trials. We have cried many tears, been frustrated beyond measure, and greatly rejoiced in tiny steps. We have found "joy" as we engage in this journey and it continues to shape us all. Life can get messy and usually doesn't go as planned. It isn't any different for any person. Our trials just look a little different. We all have them. Life is like a road. Bumps are sometimes huge potholes and we aren't sure we can ever climb out. Sometimes they are speed bumps that get our attention. Either way we are going to feel them.


One of my greatest joys is found in the messed up sayings of Ben. He hears us say things and often repeats them to the best of his ability. The other day in the kitchen he came over to me and said, "Mom, what would I ever do with you? You are the best mom I never had!"  His confused saying might seem silly or disappointing to some, but to me it rings of true joy and the faithfulness of God in every trial. It is a path worth taking.

True Strength

                                            

Weakness is defined as: lacking strength; a quality or feature regarded as a disadvantage or fault.


Weakness is a word that permits a clear negative connotation in our culture. The last thing we would want someone to say about us is; we are weak. More importantly, we go to great lengths to cover or hide our weaknesses. We are taught to keep pushing, trying, and appear that we have it all together. If we offer or show an apparent weakness we are considered inadequate. Although in some aspects of life a weakness can be a hindrance, in our spiritual life it is considered a great gift.

Unfortunately, our attitudes of self sufficiency and need to be strong leak into our spiritual lives. Our mere humanity and desire to have it all together totally barricades the power of God right out of our lives. In our attempt to look good, stay strong, and positive we tell God, I got this. I don't need your power in my life. I am good. It also shows others a false sense of ourselves and who we really rely on. By allowing others to see us in our weakness and in our great need for Christ they realize it is our dependence on Him that sets us apart. Not that we have it all together. Somewhere along the way we have adopted the concept that acknowledging our difficulties is complaining. We push on and push through all by ourselves. The ways of Jesus are so contrary to the ways of the world.

 In order to release his power in our lives we must first acknowledge our weakness. This is usually easier the bigger and more difficult the circumstance. However,  just resting in our weakness and the impossibilities of the situation is not enough. We must acknowledge the capabilities of Christ in faith to strengthen us and lead us through our circumstance.

Paul states in 2 Corinithians 12:9-10: "But, he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, I am strong."

The weaker we are and the less strength we possess in our own merit, allows for His strength and power to be magnified in us. This is a power that is unexplainable. Therefore, He receives the glory and others are drawn to him; not us. We find freedom in the power of Christ; not exhaustion and the need to be perfect.

This concept is one that hits close to home for me. I have always been driven and tried to achieve perfection. As I have continued to journey with my son Benjamin after a massive stroke during heart surgery, my eyes have been opened to just how powerful our weakness can be. In our fight to give Benjamin the best life possible and overcome very surmounting odds I have come face to face with my own weaknesses, lack of control, and slowly learned to embrace my great dependence on Christ.

God has used my sons weaknesses to show His glory and faithfullness as he continues to overcome difficulties and live for Him. In his weakness he has been made strong. The progress Benjamin has made can only be explained through the power of Christ and we give him all of the glory!